Final Word for 2008

Jerry Springer always ends every one of his shows with a final word. He makes a small speech that sums up the entire moral of the show. Regardless of the ghetto topic it is, it's usually the serious part where people are to learn something very valuable. As for me, I'm going to put it short. No speech is necessary. Here are my final words for 2008, plain and simple.

"No Regrets"

Go GREEN!

We did it! We made it to the Playoffs! We meaning Philadelphia Eagles!! Talk about HUGE victory against Dallas Cowboys (44-6)

Here's what Donovan has to say:

"Since y'all talked about me not being in the playoffs the last 4 years…I'm in…it's sweet, but you know what…I've got a job to do, and my job is to make sure that we're ready to go in Minnesota…playing against a tough team…one of our former coaches, and we just have to grab this opportunity, because this isn't just something that we're happy to be in, we want to stay in!"

I always had faith that one day their day would finally come. It might have taken them 4 years, but they did it! It's a great feeling! I almost had tears of joy but I held back. I don't cry. I'm just having the best week ever so far! Yippeee! Watch out Minnesota! Here we come!

share-bare's ranDUMB Moment #9

One word: Tilapia

I was at my lola's house the day my sissy and I got back from Las Vegas. She fried up some good fish called tilapia. It was delicious to the maximus! Anyway, a couple days later, I told MA that I wanted to get some from the Marina Supermarket. We went off with Reeni and Madre, as well. Reeni and Mads went to get their ingredients for lumpia. MA and I walked towards the fresh seafood section in search of the ever so yummy tilapia. It was crowded, as usual. Fish laying everywhere around us on loads of ice. It felt like I was at the Fish Market in Seattle or something. Busy as ever. So...we both were standing in line waiting for our turn. I'm staring into no where day dreaming and from the corner of my eye i see one of the butchers throw a huge tilapia towards my way. Immediately, I flinched and also SCREAMED. Couple seconds later, I just realized what I just had done. Strangers were staring at me giving me a weird look. I was super embarrassed and literally ran away laughing. It was so mortifying....I wanted out of the supermarket. MA and I were in tears from all the laughter. I hate when I'm caught off guard like that. Sad part is I still was not able to buy my tilapia. I even begged Madre to get it but she said the line was too long. Booo!!

Eagles in Playoffs...

I'm so hoping my team gets to at least be part of the Playoffs. McNabb deserves it. So here's the plan in order for win that spot!

1. Green Bay Packers need to win tonight against Chicago Bears
2. Oakland Raiders need to win on Sunday against Tampa Bay Bucaneers
3. New York Giants need to win on Sunday against Minnesota Vikings
4. WE NEED TO BEAT DALLAS!

I'm pretty much asking for a miracle. But you never know. Hey - Raiders had the best game ever yesterday. LOL! There's still hope!

Fox Sports Sucks Ass!

Instead of coming into work during this wet afternoon, I decided to stay in and root for my team today as they battle it out for a spot in the Playoffs with the Washington Redskins. I could of sworn FOX was Channel 2 but I guess I was wrong. It pisses me off they they decided to waste t.v. coverage on the Point After (post Niner game) AND stupid American Idol Rewind. Now what mean person would really do this to poor little old me? Cruel!!!!! Someone please tell me what channel it's on with Comcast in Foster City! Someone please tell me why I don't have access to it. And also, someone stop freakin' pissing me off by rooting for the Washington Redskins, while it's well aware you ain't even a freakin' fan! You are just being a true freakin' hater. A finger goes out to you....YEAH YOU! I'm stuck looking at a freakin' monitor refreshing the foxsports.com website every single minute. Can I say boring? This sucks ass. I'm outta here. Go FREAKIN' Eagles!! Can you tell I'm in a pissy mood?? No sh!t Sherlock!

share-bare's ranDUMB Moment #8

I'm venting to JayJay at work about my depressing body test from my honest Wii Fit. Apparently, I have the body and balance of a 41 year old. Now what a way to kick me when I'm ALREADY down. We're chilling in the kitchen and getting my daily dose of caffeine. What blend is it today?", I ask myself. Aaaah, it's the "stoner" coffee - Santa Cruz Company's Heart of Darkness blend. Boo! I take it anyways. I turn around and see a box of donuts. Yummy. "Don't do it share-bare!", JayJay yells after we have just discussed our 10 lb. gain minutes prior. I take a peek....

share-bare: Awe, they don't have my donut anyways

JayJay: What's your donut?

share-bare: I don't know if I'm pronouncing it right. I think it's called a cruder

JayJay: WTF is a cruder?! I don't even think there's such a thing, share-bare

share-bare: There is!! I swear! Its called a frenchie cruder or something. LOL!

[We both are walking away laughing. Barb, who was also in the kitchen quietly preparing her breakfast laughs in the background] ...[Minutes later, Jason decides to ask RoRo upstairs if she has any "cruders"]

JayJay: C'mon. Let's go upstairs. RoRo said she has some cruders for us. share-bare: See! She even knows what it is. Let's go.

[We walk upstairs towards her office...]

JayJay: She said she would normally get three but she didn't want to be selfish so she got two.

share-bare: Umm cuz aren't we only allowed ONE donut per person? How is taking two going to make it any better? LOL

RoRo: Hey guys! What's up?

share-bare: Hi RoRo! Where's my cruder?

[She points to her plate containing 2 quiches]

RoRo: Here you go!

LOL!

share-bare: That's not a cruder! That's quiche!

JayJay: See RoRo is just as bad as you, share-bare. LOL!

RoRo: I thought cruder was just a fancy name for this...

JayJay: Uh no, that's quiche.

RoRo: Sh*t! I'm Mexican. You really think I would know how quiche looks like?!

share-bare: Why don't people know what I'm talking about?!

JayJay: Cuz maybe it's not called a cruder!

share-bare: It's a cruder! I swear!

LOL! [The three of us take a stroll towards the reception area to visit share bear #1]

share-bare: I bet you share-bear #1 would know!

share-bear #1 : Hi Guys. What's up?

We explain our recap our story of the cruder. She laughs. I then ask her if she would know. I tell her its a french word. Automatically, she says...

share-bear #1: Oh, you mean cruller.

share-bare: Damnit, I was close! See!!

LOL! Moral of the story: This mystery favorite doughnut of mine is called a "french cruller" NOT frenchie cruder and certainly NOT quiche!

Post Biggest Loser Depression

This always happens. Immediately after every season finale of this tv reality series, I get so freakin depressed. How the hell do they do it!? There are tons of people on this show weighing at least 300 lbs! Yes - AT LEAST! And then during the finale, there just one chick that weighs less than my ass. They literally lose like half their body weight. It's freakin incredible! I look at them and I'm like.........I look fatter than her??? No way! But yes way! Talk about reality check. UGH! So what am I doing this morning? Drenching myself in sorrow and misery. And umm... oh, just looking for training programs so I can physically become a Biggest Loser, too! So typical of me. I always torture myself. I am my own worse critic. I'm always hard on myself because I know I deserve it. I even went to my account on active.com to see my results from the 2007 Nike Women Half Marathon. I just had to rub it in my face.... [sigh].... "I can do it... I know I can....I know I can...." (let's keep that mentality, share-bare)

Las Vegas Weekend with the Fab Five

A birthday celebration weekend trip to Las Vegas turned more into a family bonding time with ALL my sisters. There are 6 of us all together. 3 of my half sisters live in Las Vegas. We all stayed there. It was fun. Abby - Typical teenager anxious to take her driving test Melissa - Believes that God gifted her with her with a cute face Cathy - Curious about cutting herself and wants to know what a drive by is. (WTF) So I find out that not only do they have an ugly creepy pet hamster named Bella, they also have a cat named.....I'm so embarrassed - Kitty Puffin. AND it's a boy. Per Melissa claims it's not their cat anymore because my step mom kicked him out. Umm, seriously, who kicks out their pet? Only in my family, I guess. Poor cat was waiting up for us one night standing by the front door meowing wanting to be fed. That by the way was how we figured out who the real owners of Kitty Puffin were. Irene later finds out from our step mom that the reason why she kicked him out was because he kept her awake at night. Ummm....ok. AND that Kitty Puffin would want to sleep in their bathtub. So, I guess the next best thing is to let him sleep ummmm NOT in their house at all? LOL! Whatever's clever. I hate cats so it's more funny than sad. Sorry cat lovers!! BTW - Melissa does feed Kitty Puffin everyday. He just doesn't sleep indoors anymore. Like that makes the situation better, right? Oh well. To change the subject, here are some random pics - LOL!

Check out the new Dyson Hand Dryer!! Awesome!

My nasty niece, Bella. Yuck! Me, Jason, MJ, Nate & Rolsuno waiting to get into Tao Saturday Night Abby, MA, Me, Cathy, Melissa w/step mom (Irene is missing) I'm ready for you Pac Man!! Sike!

I Want to be on TOWS

Yet again, just on the jock! I really really want to be a guest on the Oprah Winfrey Show. Anyway, my goal is to sign up to as many shows as possible. Any topic will do. Hopefully, I will be the most frequent applicant and the casting crew will get tired of seeing my applications over and over again and just give me that special opportunity to meet Oprah in person. I want to be like Tom Cruise and jump on her couch. I want to be like her best friend Gail and go whereever she goes for FREE! I want to be a part of her audience when she gives away cars and expensive gifts! I want to train with Bob Greene to lose weight AND keep it off. I want her to help me make a successful financial plan for 2009. I want to get a free makeover so I can look HOT! I want to have a one on one session with Dr. Berman. I want to write a letter to her, too. I want to tell her that she needs to change her time slot so that the women that actually have a job can watch her. How come stay at home moms and retirees get to watch all the good stuff. They already have the Regis & Kelly Show! Not to mention them soap operas that are like on every channel from 11am - 3pm. C'mon Harpo Productions....for me?

Va-Jay-Jay

I don't know but all of a sudden I am straight up on Oprah Winfrey's jock. A couple months ago (I think) I DVR'd one of her specials about sex. Keep in mind that it's been years since I've seen an Oprah Winfrey show. I guess I don't call in sick that often from work. Don't worry people. This is not rated X. But the following will be only for mature audience. Anyway, I found out some very interesting facts that I would like to share with you. Let's get our sex education on, shall we?

• One important slang word used thanks to Oprah herself has been misused by ALOT of people including me. The slang term 'va-jay-jay' (which means vagina) does not necessarily refer to a woman's genitals. As a matter of fact, according to Dr. Laura Berman the correct term that should be used is vulva. The word vagina is not really visible to the human eye because it's an internal canal. Vulva refers to the entire external region. Now that we learned the proper term, I ask that going forward to start using the correct term. (i.e. Men have penises and women have vulvas) I suppose we might as well create an urban dictionary slang term for it, don't you think? How about vu-vee-vee? If you are totally confused, I suggest you take a look at the female anatomy - just google it or something.
• 1 in 5 couples are in sexless marriages. WTF?! I best not fall into that stastistic when I get hitched!
• Frequent sexual activity makes you look 7-12 years younger. Another known fact about having it a lot is that is reduces your chance of heart disease. It also relieves stress & insomnia, strengthens your immune system, and acts as a natural pain reliever (<----I already knew that part). Rock on.
• There are actually women in this world that lose interest in sex. Insane, right? This condition is called perimenopausal. Basically, its a drop of estrogen and testerone level in a female's body. It can affect women in their late 30s and 40s. So men, if you are in a relationship where she does not respond to sex get her help. This condition is serious but curable. Men - lets say this together: Libido is highly recommended for a successful relationship. If a women is suffering from chronic stress, that means their libido will drop so remember - again...libido is highly recommended for a successful relationship. So, don't stress her out or you'll be the one that's out of luck!
• There are 3 types of female orgasms (Guys, you jealous?):

1. Clitoral: The most common and easiest to achieve
2. Vaginal: More intense achieved through stimulation to the G-spot
3. Blended: Combination of clitoral and vaginal. Most pleasurable. Per Dr. Berman, it is a "Holy Grail"

• As women age or have babies, their pelvic floor muscles which contract during sexual intercourse get lose. To strengthen these muscles, women should practice core muscle and kegel exercises.

Some of you might be a little bit uncomfortable after reading this. Oh well. Get over it. This is stuff people should know about the female body. It's freakin normal. I hope you thought it was somewhat informative. Just trying to spread the word. and if you already knew everything I just stated above then wow! I applaud you! Kudos!

I'm Just Like Oprah

Just like Oprah Winfrey, I have "fallen off the wagon" of healthy living and gained backed all the weight I lost. You remember the weight I lost back in March? Yup, all done-zo. I'm back to the drawing board. I'm starting from scratch once gain. It's very embarrassing and just like Oprah, I'm mad at myself. I was so damn committed at the beginning of the year. I took boot camp classes in San Francisco. I ran at least twice a week. I even ate more than twice a day to keep my metabolism going. I don't know how I let this happen. Was it my busy schedule? Or was I just too damn lazy? Who knows. The face is no excuses can make the situation better. That's the reality of it all. It is what it is. I've neglected taking good care of myself.

share-bare's BIG Dirty Thirty Celebration

Written by: Ryree

Produced by: Renee, MJ and Ryree

Wednesday, November 19, 2008  

Emergency Meeting Renee, MJ, and Ryree meet in Sunnyvale to discuss share-bare’s birthday. The three noticed that she has been down in the dumps. From individual conversations with share-bare, they came to the conclusion that she is depressed. Not only is she turning the big 3-0, but most of her friends and family would not be able to make the trip to Las Vegas.  Renee claims that she went home early from work because she was upset that a few people backed out.  

The Decision The three thoughtful ladies decided to cancel the Las Vegas trip all together. They concluded that share-bare most cared about having her loved ones around her to help her celebrate this great milestone in her life. share-bare also feels as though no one cares enough to plan for her, so they decided to craft a new birthday plan, one that would surely impress the birthday girl.  

The New Plan With the help of a few other people, the following would be the new plan: Friday, December 5, 2008 Dinner would be held at California Grill in the San Mateo Marriott. GJ would be able to be the chef for the night, serving 30 of share-bare’s closest friends and family. After dinner, they would go to Milk in San Francisco. Roland was already hosting a party that night, so Mary Anne would work on reserving a table/bottle service. More of share-bare’s friends were invited for the evening event. Saturday, December 6, 2008 To continue on with the celebration, they planned to do a day outing with the kids. Bowling. One of share-bare’s favorite pastimes. In the afternoon/evening, a girl’s spa day was planned at Watercourse Way in Palo Alto. This would include her sisters, cousins, and childhood friends. Rho* offered to pay for a suite that night as well. November 20- December 1, 2008 Evites, emails, and conversations galore! They had to inform the family and friends of the new plan. Appointments were booked, hotels were canceled, and new reservations were made. One thing in the back of everyone’s mind was, “Would share-bare be disappointed?” There was no use worrying about that because everything was set. To make sure she didn’t get too disappointed, they all agreed not to initiate conversations about Las Vegas, just to lessen the blow. Amazingly enough, the secret surprise remained a secret! Family members and friends were going along with the story. December 2, 2008 This was the big day. share-bare’s official birthday! This was also the day of complete chaos. share-bare conversed with her good friend Joh on G-Chat. Poor Joh, who lives in Las Vegas, had to endure the torture of share-bare talking about specific plans during her visit. share-bare  also conversed with both of her sisters on G-Chat expressing her utter most excitement about the ‘upcoming trip.’ As it turns out, share-bare has been doing her own planning on the side, inviting random friends from New Jersey and the Bay Area to meet up with her while she is there. share-bare: do u know where we're having dinner? for sat? Joh said we'll be going to tao on saturday and the new spot lavo on sunday share-bare: omg - hella ppl are going to vegas. u better look cute for the boys me: like who? share-bare: jersey guys....Twink's cousin in-law is bringing some friends and Timotei!  LOL and then there's Joh's friends that are YOUR age and other ppl from the bay. ur gonna have so much fun. joh and i always have a good time w/random ppl! In a panic, Renee, MJ, and Ryree spoke via conference call to discuss the new revelations. They came to the conclusion that they jumped into the new plan too quickly, that share-bare was just being emo one day. So what must they do about the current plans? Everyone was already invited. Reservations and appointments were made. The Las Vegas hotel was cancelled. No one, except for Ryree and share-bare, had the following Monday off.

The New, New Plan They would continue on with the dinner. Most of her friends and family already RSVP’d and share-bare would, without doubt, be surprised. As for Milk in the evening, the bottle service had to be canceled but they would still be attending because her other friends already RSVP’d and would be there. As for the spa day, that had to be canceled altogether. It was decided; they had to find someway to make this trip to Las Vegas happen. Unfortunately, they would not be able to bring Eli, Janelle, and Tates. After searching online for most of the morning, MJ and Ryree found flights to Las Vegas for $49 each way. It was too late in the game to for anyone else to go, so it would just have to be share-bare, Renee, MJ, Nate, and Ryree. They were all to fly out Saturday. Because MJ and Renee did not have Monday off from work, they would fly back on Sunday, which gave them one night in Las Vegas to celebrate share-bare’s Birthday. Ryree and share-bare would fly out Monday morning. Because the hotel was canceled, it was impossible to find something for a reasonable price. They arranged to stay at their stepmother’s apartment on Saturday night and then at Joh’s place Sunday night.  

Conclusion All in all, one lesson has been learned from this experience. Do not try to surprise share-bare. She is so unpredictable; there is no telling what she is going to conjure up next. *Note to share-bare: Hope you enjoy your BIG Dirty Thirty celebration. To make things less complicated, we DID NOT tell the rest of the family that we are going to Vegas again. They would just not understand the story. PLEASE act as if we are not going, especially in front of Tito Steve. He was a bit disappointed that it was canceled. (Pictures from the Surprise Birthday Dinner...)

SURPRISE!!!! One of Eli's imitation of me turning the big 3 - 0.

Me with the three rascals A Very Rare Moment on a Special Day.... Thanks Girls! Love you!

share-bare says: Big THANKS goes out to Renee, Ryree & MJ for doing this all for me. You're the best. If I was affectionate, I'd give you big hugs but a high five hand slap will do. LOL! Thanks for putting up with my difficult ass. I appreciate it! Good Times it was!!

Cute Auditor Dude Part II

Now, I know what's wrong with me. I'm a freakin' wuss! I seriously have issues with making the first move yet have absolutely no problem blogging about my personal life for the entire world to read. No wonder I'm single. Even my boss says so. Don't believe me? Well here's proof of our YIM chat earlier today. I'm like the Lion from Wizard of Oz. I lost my courage and need to find it. Can someone please point me to the direction of the yellow brick road?

share-bare: It smells like vicks around me.

QB: yuck! That’s disgusting.

share-bare: I know for sure its not cute auditor dude cuz he smells good.

QB: oh you mean the dude you like yet have no guts to even TALK to.

share-bare: I hate being put on the spot!

QB: that's why you don't have a dude!

share-bare: =(  ur making me cry

QB: well, go TALK to him - about something stupid. that's how you MEET people!

share-bare: i'm shy!

QB: ya gotta get over that! I'm trying to help! Just think how nice it would be to go to dinner with a cutie like that!

share-bare: i know...i just noticed that he doesnt have ring!

QB: get on it!

share-bare: i dont even know his name!

QB: not literally.... at least not in the office!

share-bare: he'll always be cute auditor dude to me.  i know that!

QB: ;)

share-bare: ok - let's make that my goal. hopefully he'll stick around for another week.  i'm so jealous...i wish i was working on henderson. all i get is walter from PWC....

QB: you should make it your goal to figure out his name in the next day or 2! Then, within a week talk to him.... even that's too slow!

share-bare: ok ok i will bust out the mojo i have left LOL!

QB: serious! we'll get you like a quadruple shot at Starbucks!

share-bare: omg - all of a sudden i just broke out in a sweat! thank goodness for secret. QB - i have issues....

QB: LOL take him a spud bar!

share-bare: good idea! tomorrow!

QB: yeah - wear makeup

share-bare: and my black and gold strippers shoes, too, right?

QB: um, i don't think he's that type

share-bare: oh yeah, you are right.  man, i'm horrible.

QB: something professional yet.... uh.... slightly 'come-hither'

share-bare: great...i'm getting coached by my boss about how to pick up on a guy. thank goodness we are cool like that.

QB: well, at least it's me and not Leo!

share-bare: oh god yes!

QB: can you imagine what she'd tell you to wear!?!?!? that would be funny!

IHEARTBRIT

I want to go to Target so bad right now and get Britney's CD, Circus. I was up at until midnight listening to snippets of her new album on iTunes. As I was browsing the iTunes store, I saw a clickable button named, "Tour Dates". OMG - Britney is going on tour!? Yes she is everybody. That's right biatches! I knew at midnight because I'm special like that. But they officially announced Britney's 2009 tour: The Circus Starring Britney Spears (with special guests The Pussycat Dolls)in today's episode of Good Morning America. I can't wait to watch it later (I DVR'd it, of course). Anyway, internet presale tickets are on sale NOW! If you're smart enough, you'll so the EXCLUSIVE presale password (ahemm - look at the top!) $150 for general admission tickets. Crazy right? I know. Who cares. I love her! Soul Sister - I guess I'll see you in April 2009! Muah!

My Celebrity Soul Sister

HAPPY BIRTHDAY BRIT! Britney Spears is my celebrity soul sister. Can't you see the resemblance from below? Her and I share the same birthday! I'm so honored. You jelly? LOL! Yeah, I'm a dork, I know! =P Anyway, here are other celebrities that I share my birthday with: - Lucy Liu - Nelly Furtado I can't believe Nelly Furtado and I are the same age. Pretty cool if I say so myself.

Cute Auditor Dude

Attention All: Cute Auditor Dude from last year's audit is back! If only I had the guts to tell him I missed him. [sigh] If I told him I liked him, will he feel the same about me? He's literally two cubicles away. Yikes! I like have butterflies. It's a shame that darn Jason keeps embarrassing the living crap out of me. I swear every thirty minutes, I'm constantly reminded that this is my last day being 29. On top of that, he tells me that I'm too old to listen to the Cheetah Girls and also a loser for listening to Clay Aiken via Yahoo Launchcast. The entire floor can hear him mock me. That definitely ruins my chance now! Great. I had to pull him aside to ask desperately and politely to stop making a fool out of me in front of strangers. He simply laughed and walked away. Cute Auditor Dude must think I'm a low life cougar now. Auditors are normally fresh out of college. Usually they intern as a requirement for their CPA license. I don't think I've ever met one that chose Auditing as a career. I hope he never changes careers though. He's good eye candy. We actually shared a hallway at the same time this morning. Both of us were walking opposite directions towards each other. I got nervous and totally avoided eye contact by looking at the darn floor. To make matters worse, this had to be the day I'm NOT wearing make-up. In addition, I have a mushroom hair head. Note to self: I'm long overdue for another a haircut.

Twenty-Nine Will Do Just Fine

I don't mind turning 30. I just don't think I'm ready yet. Is there anyway I can delay it? Kind of like the movie, Groundhog Day. This past week, it's really hit me. I got the blues. I didn't bother to go shopping during the most busiest shopping day of the year. I didn't even bother to get my haircut. I can't believe this is my last day of being in my twenties. The twenties were a very exciting and life changing decade for me. By the time I was 20, I already had a 3 month old baby. When I was 21 I was single from my baby daddy. When I was 22, I was basically in my experimental phase that I missed out on during my late teen years. When I turned 23, I was basically in love with my best friend turned boyfriend. During that time, my dad was diagnosed with cancer. At 24, God took my father away from me. I miss him so. At 26, I purchased a condo with my ex. That same year we split forever. At 27, we sold the condo and I moved back with my mom and step-dad. At 29, I'm finally back on my own (sort of). I did alot of stuff that I couldn't even would imagined this year thanks to my Tabo List! I'm so glad I was able to document it all out on my blog. Most of it at least. I consider it to be as a memorabilia. Kind of like a cyber scrapbook. Quite neat if I do say so myself! Alot of drama went down in my twenties. I only hope life will get better from here on. It's just a bitter sweet moment right now. Time to absorb it all in for the last time and simply let it go...[sigh] Good-bye to you soon #29. You will be missed dearly.